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Sorry_Optimist [just simply whack off
 If you stand up right now and walk away there's still hope... Promise.
Pay lots of money(more money than you spend on personal hygiene products, ironically) to find love and be able to have sex again.

Ballers get:

Unlimited "Contacts" - and STD's!!

Private Investigators

Rohypinol

Handfulls of Gigantic Tits

And Much More!

 Meet the Person You're Relying on to Make Your Life Better. Be Profoundly Disappointed.
• Look at these FUCKING IDIOTS DOWN HERE!
• Search and DESTROY all 1,298,017 members
• View who's online now! (i.e., who has nothing better to do right now)
• Some people are so strange they've uploaded videos of themselves! We think it's pretty funny. You might too!

Hey_Ladies
33/M

Prettee_Eyes34
34/F

Smilin_Cutey
36/M

BurnVic40
40/M
(If you dare to) View More

Find new and unusual fucked up people through one of our local interest groups.
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 (Here's where)My Account(begins and my life ends) Oooh, yeah, More
My New Matches
See new members who match yourSTupid settings.
Who's Viewing Me?
Sorry - No one has ever looked at you. Not even the burn victim guy.
ShitList
Keep track of people you're interested in meeting, but never will because they are far too attractive to date you - what are they doing here anyway??
Touch Your Profile
View Yourself
I'm Looking For...
some decent porn, a blind man and two bottles of red wine.
Add/Edit Photos (of yourself looking SUPER CUTE!)
(If you had a)Personality(you could take this)Quiz
Video Introduction (don't do this - it's dumb)

More Stuff to waste time on.
Look how cute you are! You'll score. I just know it. I think so, at least. Hmm. Well...we'll see, eh?

 Chat Now!   Launch Virtual Porn Cabana
>Open our free IM with video so members can see your body and masturbate while pretending to chat with you!
14 Masturbating Now

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